These behaviors ruin any good memory your ex has of your relationship and make them lose respect for you. They’re so easy to fall into if you’re not actively trying to avoid them. It’s very human to feel upset after a breakup and to pester your ex for another chance or cry about it in a pathetic way. Of course, this is just going to push your ex further away. Avoid these pitfalls by following my rules.

Rule 1: Keep to Yourself

This is the best way to let your ex know that you simply don’t care after a breakup. No matter how well you follow the other rules on this list, if you’re constantly reaching out to your ex, it really doesn’t matter what you’re saying. You could be listing all their faults and telling them how much better your life is without them, but as long as you’re still bugging them, it’s going to be completely obvious how much you really do care.

Instead, make every effort to keep your distance from your ex. You both need time to cool off and process the breakup in your own way. This means no texts, no phone calls, and no dropping in to check on them for at least a month following the breakup.

Rule 2: Keep Up Your Routine

If you can keep up your routine during this time, not only will you appear like you don’t care, but you’ll actually feel less sad and depressed, and you’ll be more in control of your life. In fact, most, if not all, of these rules will not only make it look like you don’t care, they’ll make it so that you actually think less about your breakup. You start by pretending you feel a certain way, and after some time passes, you realize that you’re no longer pretending. Fake it till you make it, as they say.

Obviously, there is a good reason that your routine has been interrupted. Not only are you feeling depressed because of the breakup, but there’s a good chance that your ex was a big part of your regular routine. For instance, you probably texted each other before bed or had a regular date night.

To deal with these interruptions, you need to find new activities to fill in the gaps. If you typically went on a date every Friday, then make regular plans with your friends to have a few drinks every Friday. You’ll be surprised how big of a difference this actually makes. Stability is so important to a solid mental state, and a solid mental state is going to help you get through this and help you get your ex back.

If you don’t have a solid routine in your life, now is a great time to start one. Plot out a typical day for yourself. What do you do when you get up in the morning? What about your nighttime routine? Really, all it takes is two or three activities to create a routine. Though it might be difficult at first, once you have it in place, you’ll realize how valuable that structure can be to maintaining your physical and mental health.

You do need to allow yourself some time to grieve the relationship, so don’t hesitate to take some time to actually process things. But make sure that you set aside time for this consciously rather than letting it bubble up out of nowhere and bring you to tears at work or around friends. It’s possible to deal with these feelings without losing control. As soon as you can, make an effort to get some normalcy back in your life.

Rule 3: Don’t Complain to Mutual Friends

I know how tempting it can be to talk about your ex after a breakup, and this is especially true if you’re worried that your friends might pick sides. But the best way to combat this isn’t to let them know all the dirty details of your breakup. It’s to be the bigger person. Let them know that you still care about your ex but that the split is for the best. Show them that you don’t need them to pick a side and that they can still be friends with both of you.

This kind of maturity will make you look good both to your ex and to your friends. If you still need to vent to somebody, choose a family member or friend who isn’t close to your ex so you can be sure that it won’t get back to him or her. Venting can be a great outlet for any negative feelings that you’re holding on to.

It can also help you sort out any kind of confusion. But don’t get too caught up in your need to vent and end up creating more drama with your ex. I’m sure it goes without saying, but don’t vent directly to your ex either because that never ends well.

Rule 4: Treat Them Like an Acquaintance

This is something that always gets under an ex’s skin after a breakup in the very best way. If you do find yourself in a situation where you have to talk to your ex, instead of treating them with kid gloves or being extremely cold and rude to them, just treat them the way you would an acquaintance who you’re not that close to.

This means being friendly and polite but without any of the intimacy that they’re used to. This sudden shift in tone can really hammer home the point that the two of you have broken up. If you play it right, they can’t really be mad at you since you’re just giving them exactly what they’ve asked for.

Rule 5: Focus on Yourself

This is something that many of us lose touch with while in a long-term relationship, and it’s also one of the biggest benefits of being single. Now that you don’t have somebody else relying on you to act a certain way and fulfill certain wants and needs, you’ll truly be free to put yourself first in every situation. This can feel selfish at first, but it can also be empowering.

You’ve been through a tough thing recently, and you deserve to make yourself feel good. By treating yourself right, you’ll start to see the good that comes with a breakup, and you’ll genuinely not care as much about the negatives. Treat yourself to a new haircut, cook your favorite dinner, and watch what you want for a change.

Rule 6: Don’t Be Rude

Being rude, hostile, or otherwise nasty to your ex actually does the opposite of what you’re hoping to do. While it will make your ex feel bad in the moment, in the long run, it’s only going to make them think that the breakup was for the best. After all, no one is going to feel bad about breaking up with somebody who makes them feel like that.

Instead, find another outlet for these bad feelings. This can mean venting to friends and family, exercising, or writing down your feelings in a journal. Whatever you do, just remember that this is a long game. If you want your ex to really regret their decision, being rude to them is not the way to get there.

Rule 7: Be Spontaneous

Like I said, relationships come with certain responsibilities. You are unable to simply abandon all responsibilities and embark on a weekend trip to Vegas with your friends, remain out all night, or return home with the attractive individual you met at the bar. But now that you’ve broken up, what’s stopping you?

Now is the time to say yes to adventure and try new things. If you can be free to embrace your spontaneous side, it’s going to show you all that you’ve been missing out on during your relationship. Hopefully, this will make you realize that while breakups suck, there is always a silver lining.

Rule 8: Ignore Their Messages

This one really gets under your ex’s skin. If your ex sends you a text message, don’t reply right away. In fact, if their message isn’t a direct question that’s important, you probably don’t need to reply at all. Maybe answer one in three messages, and even then, let a bit of time go by before you hit them back with a reply.

I know this can feel petty, and it may actually be, but it really does help give your ex the message that they’re no longer your number one priority. If you do respond, keep it brief and end it with a period to let them know that you don’t expect any kind of response back. Talking to your ex can be a really hard habit to break, but if you want to show them that you don’t care, you do need to be a little bit ruthless.

Rule 9: Don’t Reach Out on Holidays or Birthdays

I understand that you probably still want to be on good terms with your ex, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But you need to remember that you two are now broken up, and that means that they can’t expect you to wish them a happy New Year or sometimes even a happy birthday. If you’re serious about letting your ex know that you just don’t care anymore, then this step can be crucial.

Conclusion

Alright, that just about does it for this list. Remember, if you can maintain your composure, you’ll regain some of the respect that you lost during the breakup. Hopefully, you found this one helpful. 

As I indicated in the opening, in this blog, I will go over the 6 usual texts your ex may send you and discuss your likely intentions and how you should react to each of them. 

Text No. 1: Missing you

Fairly common, nothing so significant right here. I miss you, want validation, and actually want you back. Although your ex might be experiencing all three of these things, it can be rather challenging to distinguish them, particularly via text message. Therefore, it’s possible that your ex simply misses you and doesn’t want you back, even if they are uttering rather wonderful and motivating words. Worse of all, they could be just lonely and know that if they get in touch with you, you will provide the necessary affirmation. This is really one of the reasons that no contact works, since it keeps you from being controlled by your ex following the split.

Let us now, however, explore the first common text message your ex might send you: “I miss you.” 

Now, its understandable that getting this kind of communication from your ex hurts. How could someone dump you and then forward you this kind of message? How are you meant to reply? 

Usually, this kind of text arrives late at night when your ex is either lonely or maybe drunk. 

Something like “I miss you,” or “I wish you were here” would indicate they might be second-guessing their choice to split. 

On the one hand, this is clearly a positive indication if you wish to see your ex again. It most certainly implies that they are experiencing emotional difficulty with the split. However, it’s also somewhat risky since it can lead A) to false hope and B) encourage you to react in an overly emotional manner, exposing your need to get back together.

When you get this kind of “I miss you” SMS from your ex? You absolutely don’t want to respond right away, saying, “I miss you so much too,” or anything like that. Before you reply in any form, you should wait at least for an hour or two. If you receive this letter late at night or in the evening, though, it is actually preferable to wait to react until the next day. You might also simply not reply at all. 

Actually, not responding in any form is nearly always the wisest choice if you are now in a period of no contact. If you do reply, once you have waited at least an hour or two, it is advisable to you to say something like, “Hey, I miss you too.” About missing, have you seen my navy blue jumper at your house? I searched nowhere for it. Changing the topic is an excellent way to answer your ex’s comment without coming across as unduly desperate or emotionally engaged.

Text No. 2: “How have you been?”

This is yet another enigmatic message with a challenging response. This is almost “What have you been up to?” or “How are you holding up?” Now, this one could be in your brain. “They’re reaching out to me to tell me how bad things have been since the breakup and that they want me back,” or “They want me to know how miserable I am so they can feel better about themselves.” Actually, though, slow down there, as the reality is that this kind of message is more likely to be a nice check-in. Given how unhappy you were the last time they saw you, perhaps they are concerned about your handling of the split. Perhaps they are seeking a moment of human connection with you since, even if they want to move on, they still value you personally. 

So avoid drawing hasty judgments here. Use great caution in your actual response. Once more, avoid responding at all if you are no-contact right now. Should those 30 days already have passed, you should answer; but, maintain it even-keeled. Tell them things they are looking forward to for you, even if this has been a trying period. Perhaps offer something you find interesting. Just resist falling into any form of self-pity or becoming very negative. Sending this message after no contact can actually be a fantastic starting point for you to start re-connecting with your ex. Just watch out not to hurry it.

Text No 3:”I hate you.”

Although you guys broke things on amicable terms, it is rather typical for this kind of message to surface from your ex. This is another difficult text you could get after a breakup. 

Generally speaking, it’s not quite as direct as declaring, “I hate you.” Your ex might make hints about their current situation, which might be much better (as per them). They could bring up prior conflicts or treat you horribly for something you did while still living together. 

Believe it or not, any type of text like this where your ex is trying to lash out or say something nasty to you is usually actually a positive indication, regardless of the precise specifics of the message, since it shows that your ex is still thinking about you and still cares about you enough to actually send the text. Though they are obviously unhappy, they are still somewhat invested in the relationship; they wouldn’t be bothered to get in touch.

How do you respond to such an aggressive or hostile message from your ex? Well, ignore it; it’s easy. You should never let yourself get drawn into any form of fight or show your ex that their remarks have emotionally offended you. Your ex might be saying this kind of stuff in an effort to get an enraged response, which they could then use to defend breaking up as a means of justification for hurting you. 

Arguing with your ex will not bring forth anything worthwhile. Your best chance, in 99.9% of all circumstances, is therefore to completely ignore this kind of message. Sure, you might win the debate and make them feel as horrible as they’re trying to make you feel (bad), but that’s really not going to solve anything, and it’s most definitely not going to help you get back your ex.

Text No. 4: Indifferent one word reply to a long text message

Sometimes you can be messaging back and forth to your ex, and he or she will reply with a one-word response—something like “okay,” “yes,” or “whatever,” essentially indicating total disinterest to you and whatever you are saying. 

So, if it seems like they are trying to stifle or shut down the conversation with this kind of apathetic one-word language, then that’s probably accurate. If your ex responds in this manner, pay attention and avoid trying to probe more. Sometimes the one-word responses indicate your ex is bored with you and you should back away; sometimes it’s just because they’re in a foul mood or in the middle of something and they don’t want to be bothered. Still, it’s time to give them some space, whatever the case. 

You thus absolutely want not to try to carry on the conversation or find out why he or she is behaving so apathetically and coldly. Better still, wait till your ex contacts you once more on their own. Don’t compel the problem until that moment. Just let them go for now.

Text No. 5: “Are you dating anyone?”

Your ex might very likely get in touch to find out whether you are seeing anyone. This might be a random inquiry or one asked in the framework of a more general conversation. Still, if you’re trying to get back together, it’s quite encouraging in either case. Why? Well, it obviously shows that your ex isn’t quite over you and typically implies that they’re apprehensive about you maybe moving on. 

Over time, this jealousy might be a tool for your benefit. 

Wait, though, before you start answering and get very eager. Don’t act only because you receive a positive note like this or any other kind of message implying that your ex is envious. 

It doesn’t follow that you should be honest and transparent in your reply or that they absolutely want you back. Actually, it’s preferable to either completely ignore the remark or respond in a vague, enigmatic manner. 

You might reply, for instance, “Oh, you know me. I’ve always been a ladies’ man, winky emoji, or something along those lines that will leave your ex wondering whether you truly are seeing somebody. Usually, it’s just best to keep your ex wondering for now, rather than offering any kind of clear response. Above all, avoid posing the identical question to them in reply. Most likely, this is what they are looking for, so they may either make you envious in return or simply get some sort of indicator that you still value and desire them. So resist the temptation.

Text No 6: “Leave me alone.”

Last but not least, your ex can message you something like, “I need some space right now,” or “Please leave me alone,” and that kind of thing. You really cannot ignore this kind of text. 

Actually, you can ignore the text itself; by which I mean you should surely not react to it, but you cannot ignore this kind of demand. You do have to accept it and follow what your ex is asking. Any message you provide will simply make matters worse since there is absolutely no way to persuade your ex that they should want to talk to you again in this situation.

To be honest, that is all that has to be done upon receiving a message of this kind from your ex. If they’re openly telling you that they want you to leave them alone, then you really have no option but to do so. You have to stop communicating with your ex until they reach out to you again. So, keep moving forward, put your phone on, do not disturb, and come back to this blog in the future, if you ever need a refresher on how to properly reply to your ex’s messages.

These are just general guidelines for texting with your ex but they apply to pretty much all situations. You’ll want to keep all six of these things in mind anytime you receive a message from your ex or anytime you start typing a new message. So let’s begin.

Rule No. 1: Always have a real reason to contact your ex.

It’s critical that you always have a reason to contact your ex you definitely do not want to be reaching out to your ex simply to greet or to show off some pointless message, which is going to be a major turn off for them. Pointless messaging gives the impression that you care too much. Also, you don’t need a perfect reason to contact your ex. You just need a reason of some kind that sounds legitimate. Even finding a funny meme on Reddit that you know your ex will enjoy can be enough of a reason to contact them. Instead of sending a meme, you could ask a question that your ex will be able to answer.

If your ex, for example is an avid gamer and you plan on buying a new PlayStation, you can ask for their opinion on which games to buy? etc. What really matters is that you actually have a reason that’s going to sound legitimate to your ex. It’s going to ensure that you don’t sound desperate or you don’t sound needy and it’s going to greatly improve the chance that your ex is actually going to reply and it’s going to keep you from drifting into pointless texting territory.

Rule No. 2: No drama or arguing 

Now this is another very important rule to keep in mind whenever you’re texting back and forth with your ex. It’s crucial that you avoid getting drawn into any kind of argument or drama with them. Your interactions with your ex should be positive and enjoyable for them and getting into a bickering match or rehashing old drama is going to do the exact opposite. Arguing or discussing a serious relationship topics in your texting exchanges will not only ensure that your ex doesn’t enjoy the conversation; it’s also going to remind him or her of why you broke up in the first place.

So simply put, you want your text to be fun and lighthearted, not full of drama and arguments.

Rule No. 3: Use humor

As we just discussed, you want to ensure that your ex enjoys any texting conversations, so one way to make sure that your ex does indeed want to read and reply to your messages is to make them funny. Now, if you find it challenging to come up with something funny to say you can just find a funny meme or a video online and send them if you know that your ex is going to get a laugh out of it.

Similarly, you can also go back to Old shared inside jokes and bring up some kind of amusing memory that’s going to make your ex smile. Please remember, not every text you send has to be funny but try to inject some humor into your text anytime that you see an opportunity to do so. 

Rule No. 4: Keep it brief 

By reading my previous blog, you’ll know that it’s important to show your ex that you’re not desperate needy or clingy and sending long, rambling texts gives the impression that you’re sitting around thinking about your ex rather than going out and living your best life.

If you were really thriving on your own since the breakup, which again is exactly what you should be doing in order to make your ex want you back, you really wouldn’t have time to sit down and send your ex a lengthy message, so keep your texts short. Keep your message to the point; no rambling, don’t put too much time into any single text; just keep them brief and fun.

Rule No. 5: Never be too quick to reply 

Now this is to play games and that’s fair, but it’s also a very effective strategy for making it look like you’re not sitting around waiting for your ex to message you. Again, avoiding looking desperate is critical, if you want your ex back. So make it clear to your ex that you’re out living life; you’re busy with social activities and work or school and avoid responding immediately to your ex’s messages.

You may ask, How long you wait before responding? maybe sometimes you reply after just 30 minutes, other times, maybe you’re genuinely busy and you you make your ex wait 5 or 6 hours for a proper response. Don’t overthink it, just make sure that you give off the impression that you’re not dropping everything to immediately reply anytime you get a message from your ex.

Rule No. 6: Be the one to end the conversation

Most of the time when you’re having a back and forth conversation with your ex over text, you want to be the one to decide when that discussion ends. That means you’ll be ignoring or just not responding to a final message from your ex. Effectively shutting down the conversation. It is quite obvious, that you don’t have to do this every single time you talk with your ex. But for the most part, you should aim to be the one to end most texting conversations with your ex.

Why,?

Well, for the same reasons I just stated, to make it seem like you’re not overly eager to talk to your ex and you’re not desperate to keep a conversation with them going on. This is also to indicate that you’re busy with life and don’t have time to have long, drawn out conversations. 

Basically, it’s a powerful move, you’re sending a message in a subtle or subconscious way to your ex that you’re of high value, and you’re quickly going to move on to somebody new if your ex doesn’t change their mind about the breakup.

Hopefully this all makes sense, and now whenever you’re messaging your ex in the future, keep these 6 golden rules in mind, and you’ll be maximizing the effectiveness of any conversations you have over text.

How exactly does jealousy backfire on you, and how does hidden jealousy vary from covert jealousy? 

Inciting jealousy is all about making your ex worry about losing you and to eventually making them want him or her to think or at least suspect that you’re seeing somebody new and that you may move on for good if they don’t come back to you very soon.This only works if your ex has no idea that you’re actually trying to make them jealous. 

It won’t work, if your ex feels as though you are performing for your own advantage. Actually, it will have the reverse influence then. Apart from the fact that you have no other options left to you, your ex would believe you to be desperate and deceitful. It is not good, and it will drive them away from you faster than almost anything else. Nobody enjoys being duped, really.

But underlying covert jealousy is keeping your ex in the dark about your actual intentions. Should you be successful in inciting covert jealousy, your ex will believe that their jealousy is totally self-driven. Actually, they’ll believe you tried to keep these things to yourself and that they’re the ones snooping into your personal life. What, therefore, are the secrets of leveraging concealed jealousy?

Employ a period of No-contact

Yes, I know you don’t want to hear me explain how the 30-day no contact rule works again, but just keep in mind that using no contact method as part of your larger plan will greatly help to make your ex feel jealous. This works, since it tells your ex you’re moved on and you’re not interested in interacting with them. You are somewhat separating yourself from your ex so that you cannot be accused of dating someone else simply to try to grab their attention. It also sets the scene for covert jealousy since it gives you enough time after the split so that, when you start dating once again, it will seem natural and not like you’re just on the rebound.

To go out and Start living. every moment

You have to get out there and begin to live your best life. Now, although many individuals would ignore this when trying to make their ex jealous, it’s actually quite crucial. Your ex isn’t expecting you to actually flourish in the weeks and months following a split. Actually, they are expecting you to laze around the house feeling self-conscious. That’s why you should do the exact opposite and start living life to the fullest.

Another way to put it is by getting out and making as many new friends as you can while being as sociable as you could possibly be. Reaching out to old acquaintances, joining a club, engaging in a new hobby, visiting the gym and being fit, reaching your objectives, and just actually flourishing. Remember that jealousy is more than romantic relationships. Since it’s displaying your ex a life they want and decided to walk away from, you want your ex to be envious that you’re having fun without them. This may be, honestly, just as potent as dating someone new. That will cause them to miss you more than ever.

Also read: Learn tested techniques to get your ex back under professional direction and that too with a 60-day money-back guarantee. Our committed programs and support can help you to meet with your ex-girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, or spouse. Get your ex back now! and start your journey towards a rekindled romance today!

Note: Learn tested techniques to get your ex back under professional direction, and that too with a 60-day money-back guarantee. Our committed programs and support can help you to meet with your ex-girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, or spouse. Get your ex back now! and start your journey towards a rekindled romance today!

Date or hang-out with the people of opposite sex

Go on dates and hang out with every opposite sex member or the people of the gender you prefer dating. This is merely a component of the hidden jealousy approach, as I mentioned earlier, but it is nonetheless crucial. Though you most likely don’t feel like going on a date with someone new right now, you should put yourself out there and start dating as soon as possible, regardless of whether you really believe it will lead anywhere in the long run. 

So, register for Tinder. Post yourself out there on internet dating sites. Take up a new hobby where you probably will run into opposite sex folks. It makes no difference, really; just go on few dates and have fun. Once more, it’s just going out and doing it that truly counts; it’s not about whether you truly connect with somebody you’re meeting casually. 

Infact, you can even simply hang out with friends of the opposite sex or of the gender you prefer dating, and that can have the same impact. The more you date, the more your ex will think that you are in high demand. Your ex might question themselves about the reasons they left you.

I’m not suggesting you should go out and have intimate relation with the entire world right now, but let your ex know you’re much sought after and that people of the other sex want you. Within the dating world, this is known as pre-selection, where you become desirable. Mingle and just flirt your heart out; being wanted is desirable to the other sex.

Leverage Social Media to indirectly pass on the message to your ex

Your ex is, of course, visiting your social media profile, no matter what, unless your relationship broke so badly that he or she blocked you. You should thus have no trouble making your ex jealous on social media. Share images of yourself engaging in highly exciting activities your ex would not have you doing. Show anything that suggests self-improvement and the exciting life you’re enjoying without them—pictures of snowboarding, bungee jumping, piano playing—you may put any of those on social media. This is to show your ex that you are high value, I will also advise before that you should snap pictures of yourself with appealing members of the other sex. Show your ex that you have a hectic social life and are really popular. Tell the world you enjoy life and that you’re happy; do everything you can to transmit that.

One significant drawback to this approach now is that you must be subtle and avoid letting your ex know your underlying motivations. You therefore want to avoid publishing anything entirely out of character for you. Therefore, avoid starting daily posting if you have never been highly active on social media in the past and usually only post a picture on Instagram once a year. Perhaps start sharing once or twice a month instead, being careful about what and how you present the message. Just keep in mind that you want to communicate the message here to your ex in an under-the-radar way that doesn’t clearly show that you’re really doing it just to give her or him a message. Always remember, this is covert jealousy.

Use mutual friends to your advantage

If you and your ex have any mutual friends or common friends, then you most certainly can use those people to let your ex know things. Share the wild exploits, you have gone on with your mutual friends. Tell them about the people you have been seeing as well as all the others hunting after you. Once you share all these wonderful events with your mutual friends, they most likely let something slip through your ex. 

People enjoy gossip, so you could as well take advantage of it. Now, I know this may sound a lot like manipulation, and maybe you feel false and dishonest doing these things, but if you are careful and subtle about this, it is a really powerful approach to make your ex jealous and re-interest them in you again. Just make sure that this isn’t your main focus while trying to get back together with your ex. While covert jealousy is more suited with a light touch, self-improvement is something you cannot really overdo. Thus, definitely back off and cease using this approach for at least a week or so if you believe you are too obvious or that your ex is beginning to catch on.

Create mystery or curiosity while having a conversation with your ex.

Inspire mystery and interest in your ex-partner. This is maybe the most successful component of the covert jealousy strategy and among the least risky or likely to backfire on you. You can make your ex genuinely wonder what you have been up to and what they are missing out on by casually making a seemingly innocuous reference to a new friend you have been hanging out with without providing much more information or explanation.

One of my favorite instances of this is something you might accomplish via text. For instance, suppose that you’re you left your favorite sweater at your ex’s house and you need to pick it up from them. When you arrange to pick it up from their house in a text message. Saying anything like, “Hey, I’m taking a friend to a movie tonight at that theater by your house,” “Could I stop on route to pick up my hoodie?” 

If you’re meeting your ex and chatting with them in person. One way to do that would be to tell an interesting or funny story about something that you’ve done since breaking up. In the process drop a reference to a to a new friend during the story. For example: You know, you could say I went snowboarding with a friend last week and the powder was so much better than that last time we went and blah blah so on and so forth. Just don’t go into any more details about who this friend is or what your relationship with him or her is, just drop the reference in a natural way during the course of conversation and leave it at that. When you do this effectively you leave your ex wondering to themselves who this new person is and what their relationship with you really is? Regardless of the truth they’re going to assume the worst and their mind is going to go crazy with wonder.

Learn tested techniques to get your ex back under professional direction, and that too with a 60-day money-back guarantee. Our committed programs and support can help you to meet with your ex-girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, or spouse. Get your ex back now! and start your journey towards a rekindled romance today!

That’s it for this blog on Covert jealousy I hope you learned something and I will see you guys again in the next blog.

Note: Learn tested techniques to get your ex back under professional direction, and that too with a 60-day money-back guarantee. Our committed programs and support can help you to meet with your ex-girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, or spouse. Get your ex back now! and start your journey towards a rekindled romance today!

When No Contact Should Be Avoided

When are those few times when no contact should be avoided? Well, let’s get into it. Maybe you’ve already been ignoring your ex for a while. You’re likely doing the right thing. But some people don’t respond well when their ex engages in no contact after a breakup, especially if things ended on good terms. So, occasionally, you might find yourself in a situation where your ex starts to get angry or upset that you’re not talking to them anymore.

Scenario 1: Ex Getting Angry or Upset

If this is the case for you, where your ex is getting annoyed by your lack of contact, then it’s actually a good sign in some ways because it shows that your ex still cares. Up to a point, continuing to use no contact in this type of scenario is actually more important than ever. You need your ex to know that you will not be available to provide emotional support or keep them entertained while they get over the post-breakup heartache and loneliness. Limiting contact says to your ex, “Get back together with me, give our relationship another chance, or I’m gone from your life for good.” And that kind of urgency—that pressure that it puts on your ex, can often be enough to make them change their mind and decide to take you back.

However, this only applies up to a certain point. As much as you want to ignore your ex and stick to the no contact rule, there may come a point where you need to break the silence to avoid causing major conflict. I’m talking about situations where you’ve cut off all communications with him or her for at least a week or two, and during that time, they’ve tried to reach out multiple times, and they’re clearly getting more and more frustrated by your lack of response.

Calming Things Down

Now, in that kind of scenario, it can be a good idea to break the silence in order to calm things down and make sure that your ex doesn’t think you’re holding a grudge or trying to get revenge. So, if your ex is clearly upset or becoming angry that they haven’t heard from you, then I recommend responding to your ex’s next message with a quick text or call to say, “Sorry, I’m not trying to be rude or anything. I’ve just been really busy, and I’m focused on moving on.” So, don’t let your ex use this as an opportunity to drag you into any kind of longer discussion, and don’t feel the need to elaborate or share any kind of emotion with your ex. Just make it clear that you’re not intentionally being rude to them; you’re just moving on with life because, apparently, they don’t want to be with you anymore. 

This is perfectly reasonable, and as long as you’re reasonably friendly and cordial to your ex, they really have no reason to continue getting upset or trying to turn things into an argument. Remember, this is what they asked for by ending the relationship, so they really have no right to be angry at you for honoring their desire to break up. Once you’ve made it clear to your ex that the lack of contact isn’t anything personal or intended to hurt them, you can usually continue with no contact until you’ve completed roughly 30 days. So, this is more of a situation where you should break contact once rather than avoiding it altogether.

Scenario 2: When you have children & shared responsibilities

This one is pretty common, especially if you’re a bit older. Unfortunately, you can’t just disappear completely if you have serious shared responsibilities with your ex, like parenting or paying bills. Most everyday topics can be safely ignored. For example, if your ex is asking, “How’s your mom?” or “Where are you going this weekend?” anything that isn’t pressing and genuinely important, that stuff can usually be safely ignored during no contact. 

But if your ex is asking you to pick up your daughter from school next week, or if you still live together and your ex is asking you to pay your half of the utility bills that are due tomorrow, those are the sorts of things that you just really can’t ignore, at least not for 30 days. So, in those cases, you’ll need to handle things as best as possible by doing whatever it is that you need to do, probably in this situation by agreeing to which days you’ll drive the kids to school, sort out who’s going to the bank to pay the overdue bills, etc. Just be polite, friendly, upbeat, and stick to the essentials. If you still live with your ex, I also recommend you read, on tips about no contact while living with your ex after a breakup.

Limited No Contact

Before we move on, I want to stress the importance of being upbeat in these kinds of interactions. During this time, you should and can break off no contact with your ex. To make the most of it, be friendlier and happier than your ex would expect from someone who just broke up with them. In situations like this, you may call this a “limited no-contact.” strategy. In which you are still in no contact but adapted to suit the situation you’re in as best as possible. Most people won’t have to worry too much about this, but the no-contact tactic can still definitely be very effective, even if it’s limited no-contact. It’s a little different, but it still works wonders.

Note: Learn tested techniques to get your ex back under professional direction, and that too with a 60-day money-back guarantee. Our committed programs and support can help you to meet with your ex-girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, or spouse. Get your ex back now! and start your journey towards a rekindled romance today!

Scenario 3: It’s been a long time since your initial break-up.

No contact is most effective immediately after a breakup. If time has already passed, then you lose a lot of the benefits of going no-contact, and in many cases, it’s a waste of time or maybe even counterproductive. So, if you’ve been apart for a long while already, your ex has let go of most of the negative memories and feelings that they had about you and your time together, which is part of what no contact is designed to achieve. 

Here’s another scenario: you’ve been split up and out of contact for months. You start talking again and it feels like you’re reconnecting. You’re afraid you’ll mess it up, so you decide to try no-contact after reading my blog. Since your ex was already responding to your advances, your sudden disappearance makes them assume you’ve moved on and found someone else or are no longer interested. This is one of those rare cases where no contact will work against you. With that said, just because it’s been months since your breakup doesn’t always mean you shouldn’t apply any contact. So, let me quickly describe two different example scenarios and how to apply no contact in each of them.

Scenario A: Regular Contact Since Breakup

You broke up with your ex five months ago, but since then, you’ve been in regular contact with him or her. You text back and forth frequently, you see one another occasionally, and you even agreed to still be friends with your ex. Essentially, you never really let go of your ex; they’re still a part of your life and someone you talk to all the time. In this kind of situation, you should still apply no-contact for at least a few weeks. Because you’re still friends, you still see your ex occasionally and speak with them regularly, you’ve never really engaged in no contact. It’s only been five months since the breakup, which is a long time but not long enough to make no contact redundant. So, if you’re in this kind of situation, apply no contact by not reaching out to your ex anymore and suddenly start becoming too busy with your new friends and hobbies to find time for them. If they text you, then ignore anything, but the most essential message is to give your ex a taste of what life is like when you’re not around.

Scenario B: Minimal Contact Since Breakup

You broke up 7 months ago, and although you spoke to your ex a few times in the early days after the breakup, you’ve not spoken with them recently. It’s been several weeks since you last reached out to your ex, and you haven’t heard from them lately either. 

Now, in this scenario, things are different than the first one. Here, you’ve already employed what really is a period of no-contact, even if you didn’t realize it. Therefore, employing another 30 days of no-contact isn’t usually necessary in this case, and waiting longer before you reach out to your ex could be a mistake. 

Time is of the essence when you’re in this kind of situation, where it’s been many months since the breakup, so you can usually skip any contact and reach out to your ex right away. If your initial attempts to contact him or her don’t get a reply or crash and burn, then you’ll need to wait at least a week or two before you try again. But generally speaking, you can skip no contact if your breakup was a long time ago and you’re no longer in regular contact with your ex.

Scenario 4: When the Ex Wants to Get Back Together

This is a no-brainer, obviously, but if your ex is saying to you outright that they want to get back together, then don’t continue with no-contact. Instead, wait a few hours and then reply with something calm and not overly eager-sounding to signal your agreement. You can say something like, “I agree. I think we can make it work if we give things another try. Meet for drinks tomorrow after work.” And then you can see your ex in person and start flirting like crazy and rebuilding your chemistry. 

Don’t hesitate to build sexual tension and initiate sexy time as soon as the opportunity presents itself, as this kind of thing can really seal the deal and get your ex to commit to giving your relationship a fresh start. 

Don’t get into any serious conversation with your ex at this point; don’t try to talk about how you’ve changed or how much you missed your ex when you were broken up. Just be calm, don’t get overexcited, and take it slow. 

If your ex isn’t outright saying that they want you back, if instead they’re saying things like, “I miss you” or “I wish you were here right now,” that is a completely different story than if they were clearly stating their desire to get back together. In this kind of situation, where they’ve just been dropping some strong signals that they still have feelings for you but are not asking you to take them back, you need to stick to no-contact as much as possible.

In conclusion, although it may not always be the best option, using no contact following a breakup is generally a smart decision. You could have to change your strategy if your ex becomes agitated by the quiet, if you have children or shared duties, if a long time has gone since the separation, or if your ex wants to get back together. Better handling of these circumstances will increase your prospects of a reconciliation. Long-term goals should be the main focus of your attention; be composed and considerate.

Note: Learn tested techniques to get your ex back under professional direction, and that too with a 60-day money-back guarantee. Our committed programs and support can help you to meet with your ex-girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, or spouse. Get your ex back now! and start your journey towards a rekindled romance today!

I’m going to cover a few things you need to be doing during Dynamic No Contact in this blog so that, without ever having to break no contact, your ex feels the strongest desire to go back to you.

Tip No 1: Remove every reminder of your Ex

Make sure you get rid of every single reminder of your ex as soon as you start using Dynamic No Contact. That means you have to put everything in a box, store it in your closet or attic, and never see it again—gifts, pictures, love notes, clothing they left at your house. This is really easy as well as hard.

You want to do this for two reasons, Reason No. 1 is that you want to think about your ex as little as possible. You realize that, right now, there are far more worthwhile things to focus your time and energy on, and you need to make sure that you’re doing those things to reduce the amount of time you spend feeling depressed and alone. 

Reason No 2: Shift the Balance of Power from your EX to you. In order to get your ex back you have to shift the balance of power from your ex to you.

One approach to address this is to develop a more resilient mindset. Chances are that you currently miss your ex terribly and that, should you run into them in public, you would melt like hot ice cream. You therefore need to adopt an abundance mentality in which your ex is only one element of the picture. 

You have to think that, your ex isn’t actually that significant. It will be far more difficult to attain your happiness and forward development if you are always surrounded by memories of your ex. You gradually won’t worry about your ex as much, though, if they’re out of sight and out of mind, and this is just where you want to be. 

If you haven’t already, go ahead, pack everything that reminds you of your Ex and hide it from view. As I said, you’ll be happy you did.

Tip No 2. Expand your Social Circle

This is one of the greatest approaches to meeting new people that can enviously make your ex jealous as well as to divert your thoughts from them. As it happens, jealousy is a very effective weapon for winning back your ex and is among the best excuses to increase your social circle. 

Growing your social circle, nevertheless, offers several other advantages. To start with, it will assist you to avoid thinking about your ex. Moreover, it complements my ‘Covert jealousy tactics’, one of my most effective psychological strategies, I designed, more of it later in the blog. Just know that it’s about making your ex jealous without being overt or blatant about it. I cannot stress enough the value of making new acquaintances during Dynamic No Contact. 

As things are, your mind is deceiving you into believing that there is only one other person in the world who is just like your ex. Your brain currently believes that you should only be with your ex. You have a lying brain, I hate to tell you that. The truth is that you haven’t met the hundreds of thousands of people, if not more, so who are just as compatible with you as your ex. 

Your brain is therefore functioning from a fictitious scarcity. 

You would likely be just as compatible, if not more, with many more men and women than you would be with your ex. You’ll be relieved to learn that the world doesn’t revolve around getting your ex back once you’ve been exposed to these folks. This insight will actually work in your favour. Here you’re utilizing human psychology since we’re all naturally drawn to highly social people and we unconsciously think that a person with a large social circle must be attractive and successful. 

Numerous research studies have demonstrated this, and it will be effective on your ex as well as those around you. Go out there, make new acquaintances, and interact with them honestly and humanly. It will amaze you how fast, at this time of transition, you can make new friends. Being frank and accommodating will help everything to fall into place.

Tip No 3.  Launch a relentless quest to improve yourself

I’m talking now about truly improving yourself in every aspect. That implies, that you should work out every day, eat better, read more, pick up new hobbies, and learn new skills—just do all in your power to ensure that you are becoming the best version of yourself. Recall that, if you’re depressed and life isn’t going anywhere, your ex won’t try to win you back. But he or she will start to question, why they ever let you go in the first place if they witness you becoming healthier, wiser, and more informed. 

Come up with a self-development schedule and stick to it. It need not take up much time. Just set out, say, an hour each day to do something that will genuinely make a difference in your life. You could, for instance, exercise for an hour on Mondays while listening to a podcast. Get instruction in woodworking on Tuesday. Go to a spin class on Wednesdays. Just be sure you never skip your hour to work on yourself. 

You will want to keep on after you establish this as a habit and begin to notice improvements in yourself. And as I previously mentioned, don’t be shocked if your ex calls to tell you how much they miss you after they notice how much you’re growing as a person. 

Sincerely, though, who knows? After you complete your self-improvement program, you can realize that you are far more attractive than your ex and perhaps be content to even move on.

Tip No 4.  Reconnect with your friends and family

Reestablish contact with your family and friends. It is therefore a fantastic moment to replace that lost company with other forms of connections. Of course, you can never totally replace someone with whom you have a strong bond, but one of the best ways to somewhat close that gap and boost your confidence and sense of security is to strengthen your current friendships.

Honestly, you most likely lost touch with some friends during your relationship, or perhaps you simply didn’t have enough time to spend with your closest friend. In any case, this is a terrific moment to reestablish contact. But never forget to enjoy yourself and put your split behind you during that time.

This is merely an opportunity to catch up with an old buddy and have fun; it’s not a therapy session. Making new acquaintances will help you to reconnect with those who never left you in the first place and forget your ex. Believe me, you’d be surprised by how much that link means. 

You may use your pals to help you win back your ex, too. During Dynamic No Contact, social media is one of the best ways to covertly send a message to your ex.  You can share photos or anecdotes of your enjoyable moments with friends—especially gorgeous friends of the other sex—and just know that your ex is feeling left out and depressed. 

It’s a terrific approach to sub-communicate to your ex that you’re enjoying life to the fullest and aren’t missing them terribly. Using friends and social media is one of the finest ways to let your ex know that you’re really over them.

Tip No 5.  Take Good care of yourself

Treat yourself. Although it is the time for introspection and development, treating yourself and infusing some positivity into your life are other important goals too. 

So, indulge in that bike or guitar you’ve always wanted, or purchase yourself those new kicks you’ve admired. It’s going to spur you on to more activity and provide you with fresh topics to discuss if you come across your ex in future. 

Stay out of a depressing cycle of thinking about your flaws and the things you could have done better. Recall that relationships break up all the time; it doesn’t indicate anything is wrong with you and you have to start by being good to yourself if you want your ex to treat you better and value what you provided to them. 

Now, one indulgence I don’t advise indulging yourself to is the consumption of too much of alchohol. It’s usually a recipe for disaster to consume any substantial amount of alcohol during this time. While for many people it can be enjoyable in the moment, you could wake up feeling much more unhappy than before. And worst of all, it can naturally cause you to contact your ex in a less than ideal way—like making a phone call at 3 am in the morning. Thus, before you turn to drinking during no-contact, think very carefully.

Tip No 6.  Try Dating around

Try dating around, or at the very least, spend a lot of time with a new people. Going on dates is ideally part of that as well. Although it may seem contradictory, the reality is that spending time with other people is far more likely to catch your ex’s attention than anything else. They are counting on precisely that. 

Now, it’s the human nature to chase for the things that you want but can’t have it. It is also a matter of power dynamics if your ex knows they can have total control and can have whatever they wants from you even though you’re not in a relationship anymore. This is unlikely to arouse feelings of longing and desire which is the whole purpose. This(dating around) is about reclaiming Some of That Power by instilling the right feelings and a little fear or sense of urgency in your ex. It’ll help them realize that if they don’t act fast, you won’t be around forever.

Since you aren’t going to be contacting your ex, you’re going to have to rely on the Grapevine (dropping hints that you are dating your mutual friend) again. So, drop a few hints and references to what you’re doing with mutual friends so that they’ll then gossip with your Ex and share the news. 

You can also use social media or just allude at this stuff quietly when you do start talking to your ex again to pique their interest. Usually, you may reasonably anticipate that word will get to your ex, or that they will question you straight out when you encounter them again.

Even if you don’t feel like dating after a breakup, it will show to you that there are other fish in the sea and greatly increase your confidence. Therefore, even though you could still be attached to your ex, you never know, dating other people might help you get back together more quickly than staying home alone.

So really that’s what sets Dynamic no contact apart from traditional no contact it’s all about moving forward with momentum and engaging with your ex from afar.

I’ll also give you some advice on what to do if you have to encounter your ex at work or school, as well as what to do if you happen to run into them someplace in the world, such as the gym or the grocery store. So, let’s begin.

Now, the truth is that you can turn these unavoidable encounters with your ex into positive conversations that will benefit your cause, but first, let me clarify that I do not recommend intentionally spending time with your ex unless you have already completed 30 days of no-contact and know exactly what you’re doing. If you haven’t reached that place yet, or if you don’t know how to use interactions with your ex to create attraction and help win them back, you’re likely to cause more harm than good.

So, if you live with your ex, can you still maintain ‘no-contact’? How does that even work?

In short, you may and should maintain no-contact to some extent, even if you still live with your ex or have to see them every day. However, because you will still encounter them on a regular basis at home, work, or school, I refer to this as limited contact. Try the following to ensure no-contact still being practiced

Limited No Contact.

Before we begin, allow me to provide a few facts concerning this type of issue.

Fact No 1

This can make it more difficult to get back together because you won’t have had a full period of no contact. You will most likely have to see and communicate with your ex on a regular basis when you cross paths at home, to settle household debts, coordinate duties, and so on. There are solutions, but they usually complicate matters.

Fact No 2

Yes, it complicates things, but it also provides you with a unique chance that you would not have had if you were still living with your ex. While no contact is an important part of getting your ex back in 95% of all breakups, The fact that you will still run across your ex at home gives you the opportunity to defy their expectations and demonstrate that you are not needy or heartbroken. Instead, you’re still an incredible catch, with a lot to offer your ex if they decide to end the relationship.

Limited No-Contact can be achieved by practicing the following

1. Avoid expressing your feelings to your ex.

Because you still have to see your ex daily, the first and most crucial thing, you should do is avoid expressing your emotions in front of him. The last thing you want to do while you’re with your ex is become emotional, cry, or strike out in fury.

If you’re feeling extremely emotional, try to go out of the house and hang out with a buddy while you get through the first pain. In general, try not to display any unpleasant emotions around your ex.

Be pleasant and upbeat, not gloomy or upset. Another thing you should avoid is confrontation with your ex. Do not allow yourself to be drawn into any quarrel or yelling match with your ex. It may be tempting at times, and your ex may even want to start something, but you want to get out of that scenario and prevent any sort of dispute or negative interaction.

2.Avoid serious discussions.

You’d like to avoid any major discussions with your ex. Try not to discuss your split, romance, or future together. And so on. This isn’t the time to have meaningful conversations with your ex. All that will do is remind your ex of the flaws in your previous relationship and the reasons they decided to end it in the first place.

So those are the things you want to avoid discussing with your ex. However, if you still want to benefit from the no-contact plan, you should stay away from the house as much as possible and limit any talks with your ex to necessary matters over the next 30 days. When you’re in limited no-contact mode, don’t fully alter your routine. To prevent running into your ex, which might appear suspicious, remain busy and avoid being at home with him whenever feasible.

Again, keep those important interactions polite, non-confrontational, and uplifting. Basically, only engage in situations when you absolutely need to. It’s also generally a good idea to avoid making any commitments about moving out or finding a new place to live if you can do so safely and without bothering your ex. Your ex may want you to move out of the house immediately, or they may want to move out themselves, and you should allow them to do so without arguing. Be positive and supportive if necessary, and don’t worry if your ex is demanding. This is all part of my first piece of advice for you, which is to challenge your ex’s expectations.

3.Challenge your ex’s expectations.

Following a split, your ex will expect you to be heartbroken and desperate. Most people experience melancholy after a breakup and undergo significant changes in their lives and daily routines such as they’ll stay in bed all day, become cold, aloof, and negative around their ex, and cease doing activities they did throughout the relationship. Again, this is what your ex expects of you. Therefore, you genuinely desire to act in the opposite direction, particularly when it comes to avoiding physical contact. Offending your ex’s expected reality by carrying on despite your pain, by continuing to watch that TV show that you and your ex used to watch together every night, by going out regularly and seeing your friends, continuing with your hobbies, and so on. All of these will make your ex doubt their decision to end the relationship. They’ll see how good you’re doing in comparison to how horrible you feel, and it’ll make them feel like they made the wrong decision.

4.Prove that you can still make your ex happy.

When you do run across your ex at home, you should utilize the opportunity to demonstrate your value. Consider this: Your ex has reasons for no longer wanting to be together. Perhaps they have become frustrated with specific activities or behaviors you engaged in during your time together. Perhaps you got too needy and clingy, extremely jealous or controlling, or you simply drifted away over time and no longer have much in common. Or, more likely, a combination of these factors contributed to your ex’s decision that you no longer had a future as a pair. Of course, this has influenced how they perceive you. They see you as the needy, controlling, jealous, and distant person they broke up with. When they think about you and your potential future together, they see more negatives than positives.

They’ve virtually forgotten what made them fall for you in the first place, and they want you to continue living without the person you broke up with. You must prove them wrong here. So, whether you see your ex at home, in the kitchen, office, or school, you want to quietly and gradually show them that you are not the person they split up with but rather the person they originally fell in love with back in your early days together. So you want to demonstrate your positive qualities, avoid making the same mistakes or doing the same things that caused the breakup and their loss of attraction, and basically show them that they were mistaken about you and that you can still be an amazing catch who will make them happy and offer a loving, healthy relationship if they give you a second chance.

5. Do the opposite of what caused you to split

This is easy to do when dealing with neediness or envy. You can just avoid doing these things in the future. When an ex-lover extends an invitation to a friend of the opposite sex to socialize, avoid being nosy or reactive; instead, give them space, be extremely cordial, and act as if the situation is inconsequential and unconcerned with you.

For example, if you feel that your ex lost interest in you because you lacked ambition or drive in life, dropped out of school, procrastinated taking up enjoyable hobbies or interests, or just spent too much time lying on the couch playing video games, Then, you can prove to your ex that this is not true by doing the opposite. Sign up for night classes at a local college, enroll in that rock climbing school down the street and start going on a regular basis, meet a new acquaintance and invite them over, or plan a trip to Thailand.

The trick here is to ensure that you do the opposite of what caused your split and your ex’s loss of attraction. And don’t bother telling your ex about these changes; since you still share the same space, they’ll figure it out on their own and take note. As I previously stated, this may seem abstract at first, but it may be a highly successful technique to influence your ex’s feelings about you in a positive way.

6. Create mystery and intrigue to plant jealousy in your ex’s thoughts.

As previously noted, living with your ex has some distinct advantages, one of which is the potential to drop subtle signals that will keep your ex guessing what’s going on and what you’re up to. So, you want to create a sense of mystery for your ex. Now, you have to be careful not to make this too obvious, because it might backfire if you go too far or execute it incorrectly, but it works. While conversing with your ex, or someone who may overhear you, tell a loaded joke about a recent acquaintance or an upcoming date.

So, for example, if your ex is standing within earshot when you’re talking to another friend on the phone, you might say something like, “Thanks for the invite; that sounds awesome, but I’m taking my friend Mike to the music festival this weekend, sorry.” Now the key is to avoid giving any more details or making it into a big deal; just casually and subtly mention something that you’re doing with a new friend in order to plant the idea in your ex’s mind, and then let

Basically, let your ex’s mind develop envy and change their perception of you. The more ambiguous you are, the more successful it will be. For example, you could casually remark to your ex that you’ll be gone next weekend. The less you tell your ex, the more they will wonder what you’re up to and why you wouldn’t share more information or invite them. This is so that you can really get into the human FOMO instinct, or fear of missing out, and your ex will frequently let their thoughts wander and wonder if your big weekend plans include going to a music festival or a party on a luxury yacht. The less you tell them, and the more ambiguous and casual you are when dropping hints, the more your ex will feel left out and wonder what you’re up to. Believe it or not, this can make a significant impact on how your ex perceives you and how attractive they find you.

7. Beware of flawless execution.

Of course, as previously stated, this is a potentially risky approach that, if not used correctly, can lead to trouble. Make sure you remain outside or away from your ex’s location for the period you stated you would be away. So make sure you have plans to attend a music festival next weekend (even if it’s alone). This is to avoid being caught attempting to create jealousy or appearing foolish for making anything up just because your ex can hear you. To prevent being caught lying or exaggerating, avoid specifics. When you get this properly, it may be extremely powerful, making your ex wonder if they should have let you leave at all.

Okay, now let’s discuss a similar topic.

8.No contact when you have to see your ex, regularly at work or school.

First and foremost, many of the previously listed tips will apply here. So sprinkle subtle clues, incite envy, defy their expectations, and simply be pleasant around your ex. By the same token, avoid envy and any forms of strife with your ex. Don’t be rude or cold toward them.

This can be a difficult needle to thread for many individuals; how do you convince your ex that you have no ill will while avoiding appearing needy or desperate? In my opinion, it is preferable to come across as frigid rather than excessively nice. what I’m saying is that if you’re too cordial and courteous to your ex, they’ll assume you’re looking for something. And because you didn’t want the relationship to end, it will be clear that you want them back.

But if you’ve read my other blogs up to this point, you’re probably trying to avoid giving that impression because it puts pressure on them. But that will only drive them further away. So keep that in mind when you speak with your ex.

If possible, always be the one to end the conversation and maintain a respectful distance from them. Avoid being overly complementary or affectionate; do not overshare or delve into their lives; and approach them as you would a friend, but not as a close friend.

This type of treatment might have a significant impact on your ex. They want you to either linger around and pester them for another chance, or be unpleasant and cold to them. And if you treat them with loving indifference, it will hurt even more because it demonstrates that you are truly over them and have no ill will. This may make them feel as if they are losing you all over again.

What if you ran into your ex at a wedding, party, etc.?

Finally, I’d like to briefly discuss how to handle one-time (or one-off), unavoidable contacts with your ex. For example, suppose you’re both attending a wedding. What if you happen to be at the gym with your ex and run into them?

Always be cool, calm, and collected when you encounter your ex, no matter what the reason is or whether you are prepared for it. Don’t make a big deal about it; don’t get stressed or emotional; and stick to casual, friendly, and humorous conversation. Make sure you properly communicate to them how well you’ve been doing since the split and how much you’ve changed, improved, and learned from it.

If you feel confident, consider employing the mystery-building strategy we discussed previously in this blog to take advantage of the circumstances. The most important thing is that you look good, act confident and positive, and give the impression that you’re quickly moving on from the breakup, which will once again help to plant the seeds of doubt in your ex’s mind and make them wonder if it was a good idea to let someone so awesome slip out of their lives.

Using some form of ‘no-contact’ is typically a key part of any effective overall strategy to get a second chance with your ex. In fact, it’s critical in at least 95% of all breakup situations, according to my experience. So, if you’re in any doubt about whether you should use ‘no-contact’, do it.

‘No-contact’ is almost never going to hurt your chances or make things worse. It’s almost always going to help your cause. I’ll also explain in the blog post about some situations where you may not want to use no-contact. But please remember that most of the time, you should be shutting down communication with your ex as soon as possible after your breakup.

Now I can’t guarantee ‘no-contact’ is going to work. But I can assure you that it’s almost certainly going to give you the best possible chance of getting your ex back. There’s really no strategy that comes even close to ‘no-contact’ in terms of being reliably effective.

How and why is ‘No-Contact’ approach so effective?

Now let’s move on to the second question. How and why does ‘no-contact’ actually work so well? There are a lot of reasons, but I’m going to focus on five of the most important ones.

1. ‘No-Contact’ gives you time to get a handle on your own emotions.

Ignoring your ex for a while after the breakup gives you time to get a handle on your own emotions. It ensures that you don’t say something to your ex that will further hurt your chances of getting them back.

2. Make your ex realize the full consequences of the breakup.

A lot of people underestimate the psychological impact this can have on them. It ensures that your ex experiences the full consequences of the breakup. It ensures that they have to suddenly learn to live without you. There’s no time for your ex to slowly adapt to the new reality. So instead of being there at any time, that they want to talk to you or see you. You’re gone!!  and they’re forced to feel how empty life can be when you’re suddenly not around it anymore. When something unexpectedly disappears, it’s challenging to adjust, and if you implement ‘no-contact’ soon after the breakup, your ex will have to endure this kind of shock treatment.

3. Exerts pressure on your ex to commit to a permanent breakup.

This reason is on the lines of the previous one. Ignoring your ex ensures that they feel as much pressure as possible to commit to a permanent breakup. So instead of having you around as a backup plan or a shoulder to cry on, you just vanished from their lives. That kind of sudden shock puts a lot of pressure on your ex to decide whether they really want to face life without you.

It ensures that they understand that breaking up means losing you completely and permanently. This kind of pressure is not cruel or harsh. Although it may feel that way, but when you employ ‘no-contact’ after being dumped, you’re actually just giving your ex what they wanted when they decided to break up. In a lot of cases, this sudden pressure to live without you can be enough on its own to force your ex to change their mind about breaking up, and even if that doesn’t happen, it still ensures that your ex feels like they don’t have much time to reverse their decision. That kind of pressure and urgency helps to elicit feelings of doubt and regret in their minds, improving your chances of eventually getting them to come back to you.

4. No-contact gives you time to focus on yourself and your own life.

Don’t mistakenly believe that ignoring your ex is the only thing you should do during a ‘no-contact’ period. You should be using the time apart from your ex to focus on yourself, rebuilding a busy social life, and getting ahead at work, in school, in your hot hobbies, etc. Be sure to use it as an opportunity to see friends and family, meet new people, pick up new hobbies, or take on new projects.

Living an interesting productive life while you’re not talking to your ex will not only make you more attractive, but you’ll also create plenty of things to talk about when you do re-establish contact.

5. ‘No-contact’ can make your ex miss you.

Yes, that’s true. Having a period of no-contact makes your ex miss you. In fact, nothing you can do or say is going to make your ex miss you more than a period of ‘no-contact’.

The only way to make someone miss you is to disappear from their life, completely. ‘No-contact’ does exactly that and as you’ll know from reading the blog further, why making your ex miss you is critical if you want them to take you back.

So ‘no-contact’ will ensure that your ex feels the full impact of losing you, and in turn, that will greatly increase your overall chance of getting them back. While ‘no-contact’ approach isn’t 100% effective, you can now see why it is almost always the best method to win back your ex. It offers several benefits, and it can sometimes be enough on its own to make your ex realize they’ve made a mistake and beg you to take them back.

If you want your ex back, it will take more than just sending them presents and romantic notes. No matter how expensive or ideal the present is, it will be appreciated. Your letter’s aesthetic value is irrelevant. Actually, by doing this you’re making things worse for yourself in terms of getting your ex back.

Why gifting your ex doesn’t work? coz it gives a wrong message

For several reasons, the most obvious being the outcomes, it is ineffective. Thousands of clients have had this conversation with me; they’ve bought an expensive present for their ex, and I’ve told them multiple times not to give it to them. After hearing my side of the story, they usually say they won’t give them the gift, but then they end up giving it to them nonetheless. So, I can almost guarantee that they will feel remorseful the next time they contact me. Why? For whatever reason, their ex-partner has either completely ignored the present, rejected it, or smashed it into a million pieces.

Many people in a breakup might think that this is too harsh. My ex would never do that. The numbers don’t lie here. This is a common occurrence where the numbers don’t lie. In the vain hope that it will alter the dynamic between you, don’t offer them a present on any occasion. Hold yourself, even if it’s Christmas, their birthday, or graduation. The message sent by purchasing an item for an ex-lover when requesting their return is one of extreme desperation. What you should be saying to your ex is exactly the reverse of this. This gifting and stuff sends the message to your ex that you’re trying to win them back with something materialistic.

The message you should be giving to your ex

If you’re trying to get back together, you need to appear like you’re thriving, and happy, without them Their plight has become completely irrelevant to you. If you want to convince them to reconsider splitting up and instead see a future with you, that’s your only option.

What’s wrong with the Love Letters?

Love letters are just as bad as gifts maybe even worse. It can be understood why the idea of spilling your heart out to your ex can be appealing. You want to put it all out there, say what you feel, and be done with it. But what we have seen so far in dealing with ex’s suggests, that your emotions aren’t the solution here. Your ex knows how you feel and this hasn’t swayed their decision to this point. So why would reiterating it in a letter change anything. Rather, it’s only going to put pressure on your ex which will make them even more likely to pull away or even outright reject you. 

Therefore, the lesson to be learned from this is that you should not attempt to give your ex-partner a gift, send them flowers, or write them a love note. Most of the time, that is not going to work at all.

Most of the time, it is in your thoughts.

Unfortunately, compulsive over-analysis is virtually always a waste of time and energy. Sometimes there is a secret significance behind your ex’s acts or comments, but most of the time it is all in your imagination.

So, for example, one of my customers recently called me to inquire whether his ex’s recent Facebook status update, in which she stated that she was enjoying her vacation, was designed to make him envious. Now, for this specific customer, seeing his ex’s Facebook status update was probably traumatic. He couldn’t get over the fact that his ex was enjoying being on vacation without him. However, to those of us who are not emotionally concerned in this circumstance, it appears absurd to believe that this seemingly inherent status update was designed to make her ex envious. Although I cannot say for certain, I believe she was simply informing the world that her vacation was going well. As a result, over-analysis is both inefficient and sometimes harmful.

Over-analyzing after a breakup can be dangerous

It is possible that this person sent an angry message in response to his ex’s recent status update. That would just make him appear desperate and petty, irritate his ex, and aggravate the problem overall. So, unless you’re completely positive that your ex’s behavior or comments are directed at you and intended to convey a message, don’t go anymore. This is because you will probably inflict more harm than good.

Yes, your ex’s behavior or words may include a hidden message or signal that you must decode. But that is rare. Most of the time, your ex’s behavior has no deeper meaning or secret message that you must understand. If you keep overanalyzing things, it will have no good effect on your attempts to reclaim them.

So, instead of fretting about what your ex is doing. Focus on yourself and the things over which you have control at this point. In the long term, ignoring your ex and focusing on yourself will be much more beneficial and less unpleasant. So try to keep the big picture in mind and refrain from overanalyzing.